Pure Awkward |2| A Right Shower Altogether

Story, boy? Be pure wide and keep sketch because I’m not able if the girls come round the corner.

I don’t know about ye, but my week has been terrible. After last week’s disaster, I’m like a prisoner in my own house. They’re after settling it now, that I have to remain in my own bed and not to be knocking on any doors. Jaysus. You can’t put a foot right in a house full of women, let me tell ya. I didn’t think it was a big deal but apparently you can’t just be getting into bed with different women when you feel like it? Sure, it was pure innocent. What’s the big deal, like? Ellen is sound enough but Anna was like:

“You have to stay in your own bed!” Sure I was only sleeping, like. My own bed is a single and it isn’t as comfy. Anyway lad, pure awks. I’m glad it’s all over.

This week was another disaster, then. There’s never any trouble when I’m in the shower but I’m always in trouble then if I head in to the bathroom when any of them are in there. I went in because I was dying to go. I didn’t think it would be such a big deal. Your one Kate was roaring at me to get out. Sure, Jesus! She hasn’t anything I haven’t seen before like.  I’d say she thought I was having a right gawk at her bits. I told her I wasn’t but sure of course I was, I’m only a man after all! Whenever I head to the loo it’s for the entire fecking world to see. I have no privacy at all but with the girls it’s a whole different story.

They are obsessed with that shower. What is it with women and washing? Jesus. They spend hours and hours in there; washing and putting lotions and potions on. They smell like a sweet shop. If it was up to me, I’d never shower. I hate it. It takes yonks for your hair to dry and you smell like a girl after it. The girls bought me a new shampoo and it makes my hair smell like a bag of sweets. I’m forever asking for them to get me a real ‘man’ shampoo but I’ll suffer on lads. I’ll suffer on.

I’m waiting for something to be said about the incident with Kate. There will be another house meeting about it. You just wait. Feck sake. I’m always doing something wrong. I am a walking disaster, boy. I know the others will have something to say about it. I think it’s unfair that I’m not given the same respect that they are: just because I’m a boy. Girls have more bits to be hiding from us. Sure, I don’t care one bit about the likes of that.

It’s really made worse by the fact that I was lying on her bed when she came out of the shower. She was raging when she came in and found me. She said:

“You can’t just be heading into the bathroom, Brody. It’s weird! I was naked in there.”

I never said a word. I think it’s easier when you keep the head down. It was pure awkward.

Listen lads I’m out the gap! I’ll be on to ye! Good luck!

Main Image via bathroomcity.co.uk