Secret Sandra – A New Holiday Tradition

Last week, I tried to type the words Secret Santa and, due to a combination of autocorrect and meaty thumbs, ended up with Secret Sandra. Now, the phrase Secret Sandra is objectively one of the funniest things ever but what is Secret Sandra? I’ve been thinking a lot about this and so have some of Ireland’s finest minds like Tara Flynn, Sarah Breen, Ellen Tannam, and Dee McDonnell and we had some ideas. Whichever one of these you all like best will become the official definition of Secret Sandra so read and consider them all carefully.

Potential Secret Sandra Definition #1

Secret Sandra is a lot like Secret Santa except you don’t draw a piece of paper with a co-worker’s name on it. Instead, all but one of the pieces of paper say “Not Secret Sandra” on them. The other one? You guessed it, it says “Secret Sandra”. Secret Sandra then has to buy a present for everyone else in the office but Secret Sandra must remain anonymous. It’s a thankless and expensive task. Secret Sandra hates it and everybody gets sub-standard presents because Secret Sandra has to buy so many.

Potential Secret Sandra Definition #2

Sandra Bullock goes undercover in a variety of charities and is moved by what she finds there. At the end she rips off her disguise, usually a Keanu Reeves mask, and shouts “IT’SA ME, SECRET SANDRA” and everybody is shocked because they thought it was Keanu Reeves and then she gives them some money and signed memorabilia from While You Were Sleeping.

Potential Secret Sandra Definition #3

Secret Sandra is a secret. Shush.

Potential Secret Sandra Definition #4

Secret Sandra is a Secret Service agent, an orphan found on a doorstep when she was just six months old, the only clue to her identity a pumpkin with 183 notches and the name Sandra scored into it. Sandra was taken in by a mysterious order of Secret Service agents, The Secretest Service, and worked her way up to protecting POTUS himself. But now Secret Sandra’s mysterious past is catching up with her. Can she figure out where she came from in time to avoid a global catastrophe or will Secret Sandra remain a secret forever, even to…herself…Secret Sandra.

Potential Secret Sandra Definition #5

Secret Sandra is a funny autocorrect thing. Stop overthinking it Alan, it’s funny by itself. You’re ruining it. You always ruin it.

Thanks again to Sarah Breen, Tara Flynn, Ellen Tannam, and Dee McDonnell for their help with this brainstorming.

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